The other day Christina was trying to make a hat with her toy and after a while she came to me and said, “Mommy, can you help me?”
I told her, “Try it by yourself first and I’ll help you when you can’t make it.”
Then she said, “But I want to succeed” (probably a term she learned from Dora the Explorer, and what she means is “I don’t want to fail.”)
After she said that I couldn’t stop thinking about what she had said because I’m not sure when I began to understand what “failure” means or feels like, but it surely wasn’t at four years old. Well, I probably didn’t feel much and only told myself “hmm, tough cookies,” then moved onto the next thing. Imagine if you had to worry about every little thing before you even start. How many things would still be fun?
Because I teach in kindergarten I know that she is not the only kid that thinks like that.
I can’t help but wonder, “Where is this pressure coming from? From parents, kids themselves, competition?”
If that’s the thinking that’s already in their minds then what can we do to show them that life is not all about success and failure. Live with heart and experience life to the full are the most important elements to live by and don’t miss out on the wonders of the journey while getting to your destination.
有一天,Nana正在玩ㄧ個組合玩具,她突然跑來告訴我”媽咪,妳幫我做好嗎?”
我回答”你先自己做做看,如果你組不起來我會幫你.”
Nana”我想要成功…” (她應該是從Dora DVD中學會了”成功”這個詞,但影片中不常講到失敗,Nana其實是想說:我不想失敗)
於是我開始想:我是從幾歲時開始體會,瞭解失敗的感覺呢? ㄧ定不是四歲…. 我又問自己”那麼小時候如果做任何事失敗了,我會如何?” 答案是–哇…喔…然後默默飄開去找下ㄧ件事來做. 想想看,在你開始任何事前你就必須要擔心你的成敗.那麼有多少事情還能保有它原有的樂趣呢?
也身為老師的我,能清楚的知道這是現在的孩子常有的心態,那麼這樣的壓力到底是來自何處呢? 是父母的期待….孩子本身的自我要求….同儕的競爭?
如果孩子們已經有了這樣的想法,大人們又該如何讓孩子們理解”成敗絕對只是生活中,人生中的ㄧ小部分. 用心生活,體驗人生才是最重要的環節呀~親愛的孩子們,不要為了短暫的結局而錯過精彩的過程”
